Today- The Manning Family
I don’t know where to start. Today was extremely difficult. As the dust settled after the news of Katie’s impending surgery we started to have more questions than answers. Thankfully, by this evening we were able to talk with a variety of people and gain a clearer understanding of what lays ahead. Unfortunately, the one thing that is becoming abundently clear is that the odds are firmly against us.
Katie’s heart function is significantly deminished and not improving. Vickie and I are growing concerned about the course of treatment and we have called for a “family meeting” tomorrow which would bring all of the key players into the room at one time. While we have consistently advocated for Katie over the past 5 months, now is not the time for civility or patience. Now is a time for answers, clarity, and one great effort. We are beginning to realize that this is the epitome of critical care. We want to be sure that this surgery is the right thing to do. We want to be clear about ALL of the options we have and then we as parents will take the steps we feel are appropriate for our beautiful daughter.
Tonight we spent some time talking to the intensivist who we really admire and respect. In her soft yet direct manner, she portrayed a bleak outlook. I don’t mean to imply that she was negative, but she was very honest about the severity of our daughter’s condition. Katie is very sick and has limited chances for long term success.
Tonight Vickie and I met to discuss Katie’s future and ensure that we are on the same page going into the next couple of days. Our priorities are clear and simple. Priority 1- avoid any and all unnecessary suffering for Katie. Priority 2- fix Katie. The order of these priorities is of paramount importance to us. We have no idea what the next couple of days will hold for us. We have moved far beyond struggles with fairness or rightness. We have even moved beyond positive. Now we live in hope…hope that Katie can have peace, hope that as parents we will make the right decisions for our daughter.
I’m not sure how much I’ll be doing this in the coming days…maybe a lot, probably a little. Vickie and I are broken hearted for our daughter. Life has never felt so gray. Right now though, Katie is here and as long as that is true we will continue to love her with all of our hearts. We are just becoming more aware that all the love in our hearts can’t fix the pain in hers.
October 27, 2008 at 12:22 am
Alan and Vickie–My prayers are with you as you wrestle with such a burden. Katie is very blessed to have parents with such deep love and concern for her; a love that puts self-interest aside and boldly confronts reality despite the unbelievable pain it must be. Wishing continued strength as well as the ability to lean on others to carry you through.
Comfort and grace,
RG
October 27, 2008 at 6:41 am
Wishing you all peace and strength. The family picture that you posted is beautiful.
October 27, 2008 at 7:26 am
We know that whatever decisions you make will be right. Your strength, understanding, compassion and love is unsurmountable when it comes to that gorgeous little girl. Please give her a little hug and a kiss from us. Prayers for continued guidance and much love just because.
October 27, 2008 at 7:34 am
God Bless all of you. We are here in prayer for the right choices to be made for your beautiful Katie.
Hug and love,
Heidi
October 27, 2008 at 7:46 am
please give that little angel a kiss on both cheeks for me. knowing how so very much you love her and want to protect her from further pain and suffering, you will make the right decision for her. whatever the decsion and whatever the outcome, it is in GOd’s hands where Katie has been since she took her first breath. i will continue to keep all of you in my heart each and every minute and hope that you will find comfort in each other as you go forward. i love you and will be here for you always. gayle
October 27, 2008 at 7:51 am
Katie has been lifted in my prayers since the day she was born. Even more so, you as her parents have never left my thoughts. You always need to do what is right in your hearts. There is no advice that anyone can give that is better than what is within the two of you. It’s your right and your obligation to get frustrated, get furious, ask the hard questions that no one wants to answer, and then ask them again and again. Never stop looking for the solution or care plan that feels right for you and is best for YOUR daughter. Doctors don’t always like to “think outside the box,” but be an advocate for Katie. Your strength, although you may feel weak and helpless at times, is never more powerful than now. Love each other, love Katie and know that the prayers and support is surrounding you at this time. May God hold you and keep you in the palm of his hands. May God lift you up and shine his face upon you, and give you peace.
October 27, 2008 at 8:49 am
We are all with you in prayer, mind and spirit, Alan, Vickie and Katie. Our hearts are aching watching ye so painfully struggle with your sadness and Katie’s suffering. We ask that God’s strength and healing surround the three of ye and both of your families. We all wish peace for little angel Katie and ask God to grace ye with his Love and compassion and support ye so your hearts decision will be the right one.
Our love and God’s light be with ye every second.
Hilary, Michael, Ciana & Fi
October 27, 2008 at 9:10 am
Alan and Vickie,
I hardly know the words to say to you at this moment. I love the two of you and Katie so much, and I can’t say enough how much I admire your continued strength and resolve. I will continue to pray that God gives you wisdom and discernment in making the right decisions for Katie, and ultimately, that he brings all of you peace. There are so many people rooting for you and Katie, and I hope that helps keep your spirits lifted in this difficult time.
Wishing you all the best,
Dan
October 27, 2008 at 9:33 am
Sending you all love and prayers as you endure this difficult time. Continue to trust that God has a plan for Katie. Your family is in my prayers daily. Alicia
October 27, 2008 at 10:15 am
Vickie and Alan,
We are keeping the three of you at the top of our prayer list. We often go through life full of regrets…..full of “if only’s”. The two of you have loved Katie and have done everything in your power for her, that you cannot have a single regret. She has been a fighter from the start and has shown us all what it means to carry the Manning name. These are the times when our faith comes into question. God has a plan for Katie and we’ll take care of her whatever the outcome.
Please know that Becca and I love the three of you very much and are prepared to do whatever we can for you guys.
October 27, 2008 at 10:29 am
Vickie and Alan,
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your beuatiful angel! No matter what the path may lead she will forever be with you, loving you, guiding you, and giving you the strength that you give to her.
Alyson
October 27, 2008 at 11:06 am
At church on Saturday night, we heard the story of Solomon from the book of Ecclesiastes. The sermon was about the tragedies that often accompany life and that ultimately, God does have a plan for each and every one of us. It’s not always pleasant or easy, but it is there–we just need to have faith in God that he knows what is best. At the end of the service, each person took a balloon to release outside, as a symbol of us giving over a painful, unpleasant event to God–Katie was my balloon. I released her balloon in the midst of hundreds of others, confident that God sees and feels each one of those balloons and cries along with us. It is not fair or pleasant that Katie has had to endure what she has had to endure in her 5 short months. We can only remain hopeful that God’s plan will be revealed to us. Stay strong and know that there are hundreds of people out there, loving and supporting all three of you during this difficult time.
October 27, 2008 at 11:08 am
Alan & Vickie – you continue to amaze me and inspire me as parents. Your priority for Katie – that she not be subjected to suffering – is so selfless. You have put Katie first, ahead of your own pain, and if every parent did this, the world be a much better place. So our prayers join yours that Katie not suffer. As for Miss Katie, she inspires me as well. How a 5 month old little girl knows so much about perseverance, I’ll never know. Clearly, Katie has a mission to teach us all a few things. Hang tough – we cannot know God’s plan.
October 27, 2008 at 1:22 pm
Vickie and Alan- I am unable to put my thoughts into words at this time. Just know that you will remain in my prayers.
October 27, 2008 at 1:23 pm
Continuing to pray for Katie and the both of you…that you will have the support, strength, faith, and wisdom necessary to get through the next couple of days. Jae and I are here for you in whatever way you need.
October 27, 2008 at 3:07 pm
My prayers are for both of your priorities to come to fruition – My hope is also for peace for Kaite and her family – My belief is that Katie is so blessed with you as her parents and advocates ….Katie is so loved by so many…continued strength during these dark, difficult days – The 3 of you never leave my thoughts.
October 27, 2008 at 3:21 pm
Best of luck for Katie and the rest of the family. I’m thinking about all of you…
October 27, 2008 at 4:23 pm
Good Luck, Katie! Fight the good fight!
Alan and Vickie, you two stand strong together and grab any kind of rest when you can get it. I’ll mention Katie on my blog tonight; there’ll be a few more keeping you in their thoughts.
Steve
Adventures of a Funky Heart
http://tricuspid.wordpress.com/
October 27, 2008 at 5:57 pm
Alan & Vickie this is really troubled times for you all esperially Katie. I will now light another candle and pray for you all. ~Our thought here in Ireland are with you and may the hands of the surgeon be guided so that all will be well. Noel & fiona
October 27, 2008 at 6:50 pm
[...] have been on our hearts as they are at a very difficult place with Katie’s HLHS treatment (click here). It serves to remind me of what a delicate process we’re on. It has often occurred to me in [...]
October 27, 2008 at 8:16 pm
Katie is top of the list of everyones prayers here in Cork. Also praying for the doctors and nurses that they all make the right decisions.May God bless you all.
October 28, 2008 at 2:21 am
While reading Rudy’s Beat we heard about Katie. We will add her to our prayers as well. She is a beautiful little girl.
God bless you all.
October 28, 2008 at 7:11 am
I’m Rudy’s uncle and learned from his blog of your situation. Please know that I am praying for Katie and for you, that the peace you desire will come.